Suicide Prevention and Self-Harm Support Resources

• BeeU- 0-25 Mental Health Service 0300 124 0093 - www.beeu.org.uk
• Kooth - Free, anonymous online counselling through your phone, tablet, laptop or PC.  Anyone aged 11-25, living in Shropshire and Telford & Wrekin, can register to access this service.  No referral is needed - www.kooth.com
• Children's Society- Drop-in service, BEAM, is now available from The Children's Society (no referral required) - AskBeam@childrenssociety.org.uk
• MIND Info Line - 0845 766 0163 / 01743 3686647
• GP or NHS direct 111
• Shropshire Youth Association - http://www.sya.org.uk/

• Childline- 24hr helpline for children and young people under 18 providing confidential counselling, call 0800 1111
• PAPYRUS - offers a helpline to give support, practical advice and information to anyone concerned that a young person may be suicidal - HOPELineUK: 08000684141
• Self injury support - supports women and girls in emotional distress, especially those who self-harm, or their friends or relatives. Limited opening hours. TESS text number for support - 0780 047 2908 TESS email
• National Self-harm Network - support for people who self-harm, provides free information pack to service users
• Samaritans - confidential, emotional support for anybody who in crisis: 08457 90 90 90
• Young Minds - information on a range of subjects relevant to young people. Call 0808 802 5544 www.youngminds.org.uk
• The Mix - http://www.themix.org.uk/
• NSPCC Helpline - If you're worried about a child, even if you're unsure, contact our professional counsellors 24/7 for help, advice and support. Tel: 0808 800 5000

Talking about suicide can be a nerve-wracking thing to do – for the person who is suicidal and for anyone who may be concerned about them. You can find examples of how to start a conversation about suicide here. If you are asking a loved one, family member or friend if they are suicidal, it can be distressing to learn that they feel this way and it can difficult to comprehend.

Lots of people worry that asking and talking about suicide will make suicide more likely to happen – but this isn’t the case. Asking a direct question that requires a yes or no answer will ensure that there is no confusion and that the person will

understand you are asking them about suicide and nothing else. Potentially, sharing these feelings with someone for the first time may give that young person a huge sense of relief. For many years, people have believed that asking about suicide could put the idea of suicide into someone’s head. This is not the case. If someone is thinking of suicide, they’re already thinking about suicide.

It’s not always easy to know if someone is suicidal. After all, we cannot read other people’s minds to truly understand how they are feeling in any given moment.

Sometimes though, there may be signs that a young person is feeling suicidal; some signs are more obvious than others and some can be quite subtle. After all, some young people may not have the skills, confidence or language to describe how they feel. Therefore, we might need to pay a little more attention than usual. Alternatively, some young people may be more comfortable directly expressing their thoughts of suicide which will allow us to explore them further.

So, what might the signs be? People thinking about suicide often invite us to ask directly if suicide has become an option for them.

There is no exhaustive list of ‘invitations’ but the following could all be indicators that someone is experiencing thoughts of suicide:

• changes in behaviour (loss of interest/withdrawal, giving away possessions),
• physical indicators (weight loss, lack of interest in appearance),
• expressing thoughts or feelings (Hopeless, sad, guilty, worthless)
• words/language being used (“I can’t take it anymore”, “Everyone would be better off without me”)

Recent research has indicated that asking a young person if they are experiencing thoughts of suicide can actually reduce the risk of them ending their life. Asking and determining if that person is feeling suicidal gives you the opportunity to explore those feelings further and support them to stay safe.

The most important thing to do to ascertain if someone is struggling with thoughts of suicide is to ASK!

Factors that motivate people to self-harm include a desire to escape an unbearable situation or intolerable emotional pain, to reduce tension, to express hostility, to induce guilt or to increase caring from others.

A young person may self-harm because they're suffering depression, have a psychiatric disorder, have low self-esteem, have a difficult family life, are suffering from abuse or neglect, have difficulty in forming relationships or because they're isolated or being bullied. There may be many other reasons why a young person chooses to self-harm, and it's usually the symptom of an underlying problem.  

Examples of self-harming behaviour include:

• Cutting
• Taking an overdose of tablets
• Swallowing hazardous materials or substances
• Burning, either physically or chemically
• Over/under medicating, eg misuse of insulin
• Punching/hitting/bruising
• Hair-pulling/skin picking/head-banging
• Episodes of alcohol/drug abuse or over/under eating, at times may be deliberate acts of self-harm
• Risky sexual behaviour

The young person's behaviour and emotional wellbeing may have changed. They may suffer mood swings and become withdrawn. Other signs to be aware of may include:

• Changes in eating/sleeping habits
• Increased isolation from friends/family
• Low self-esteem or an increase in negative self-talk
• Frequent injuries (ie cuts, bruises, burns) with suspicious explanations
• Covering up their body (even in warm weather)
• The presence of behaviours that often accompany self-injury: eating disorders, drugs/alcohol misuse, excessive risk taking
• Discovery of tools used for self-injury (broken disposable razors, lighters, un-bent paper clips)

Help the person to find different ways of coping by:

• Keeping an open mind
• Making time to listen, but don't pressurise them to talk. Writing down feelings may be easier for them than talking
• Allowing them to talk about how they feel is probably the most important thing you can do for them. Just feeling that someone is listening and that they're being heard can really help. Good listening is a skill. Always let the person finish what they're saying and, while they're talking, try not to be thinking of the next thing you're going to say

Replacing the self-harm with other, safer, coping strategies can be a positive and more helpful way of dealing with difficult things in your life. Helpful strategies can include:

• Finding someone to talk to about your feelings
• Talking to someone on the phone, perhaps via a helpline
• Writing and drawing about your feelings if it's difficult to talk about your feelings
• Scribbling on and/or ripping up paper
• Flicking an elastic band on your wrists, or arms or legs
• Listening to music
• Doing some exercise
• Getting out of the house and going somewhere where there are other people
• Keeping a diary
• Having a bath/using relaxing oils
• Hitting a pillow or other soft object
• Watching a favourite film

If you are worried about a friend see below for information on how you can help.

You can really help by just being there, listening and giving support:

• Be open and honest. If you're a young person who is worried about your friends safety you should tell an adult. Let your friend know that you're going to do this and you're doing it because you care about them.
• Encourage your friend to get help. You can go with your friend or tell someone that he or she wants to know about it
• Get information from telephone helplines, websites, a library, etc. This can help you to understand what your friend is experiencing
• Allowing them to talk about how they feel is probably the most important thing you can do for them. Just feeling that someone is listening and that they're being heard can really help. Good listening is a skill. Always let the person finish what they're saying and, while they're talking, try not to be thinking of the next thing you're going to say.
• Keeping an open mind
• Making time to listen, but don't pressurise them to talk. Writing down feelings may be easier for them than talking
• MIND Info Line - 0845 766 0163 / 01743 3686647
• GP or NHS direct 111

You can also look into some of the training that is offered by Joint Training on Self-Harm and Suicide Prevention

Or you can look at the resources available on this page, or suggest one of the apps which we have created pages for below. 

The NSPCC gives the following advice for parents and carers of young who are feeling suicidal in its publication 'On the edge', 2014:

• Seek help from professionals - speak to your GP in the first instance, who can refer you to the right service.
• Be patient - Show you understand but let your child know that you are concerned and are there for them when they feel ready to talk.
• Listen carefully to what they say - It is vital you listen carefully to what they are telling you.  Show them you understand by repeating what they say to you.
• Ask your child what they need - Before you offer advice, ask your child what they need from you and what they think would help.
• Reassure - One of the most important things you can do is reassure your child that you love them, are proud of them, and are not angry with them.  Explain to them that their feelings are not uncommon and that they can overcome them and move forward.
• Don't ignore what has happened - Be open, discuss concerns and try to deal with them together, keep an open mind and be accepting.  If they say that they're thinking about suicide, aim to agree what you will do together and get immediate help.
• Encourage them to get help - See below for sources of help.
• Offer support, but let them take the lead - Offer to support your child, for example by contacting local services for them, or going to an appointment with them.  However, it's very important to let your child take the lead and decide the level of involvement they want from you.
• Seek support for yourself - Finding out your child is feeling suicidal or self-harming can be distressing.  So give yourself time to understand your own feelings and recognise when you might need support.  Talk about what's happened with someone you trust or call one of the dedicated helplines such as NSPCC, or Young Minds - see below for contact details.

• Suicide is the act of taking one’s own life. It is sometimes a way for people to escape pain or suffering.
• Self-harm is any deliberate, non-suicidal behaviour that inflicts physical harm on the body and is aimed at relieving emotional distress. Self-harm is a coping mechanism. An individual harms their physical self to deal with emotional pain, or to break feelings of numbness by arousing sensation.

·         Suicide Prevention & Self-Harm

• The Suicide Care Pathway and the Self Harm Pathway have been revised to include the referral route into the new Bee U Service.
• If you have concerns that a young person has suicidal thoughts intentions and/or plans you must follow the steps laid out in the Suicide Prevention Care Pathway.
• Access the Self-Harm Pathway, Policy & Guidance which includes guidance and tools for practitioners working with young people who are self-harming.

An information leaflet for parents & carers with support services for those who self harm can be accessed in the Related Media link on the right of this page.